I am not a bar regular and I will probably never be one, though Rosie Schaap’s memoir has given me a yearning to find a tucked-away cozy joint somewhere, which could be a little getaway when I need it. In every chapter Rosie takes the reader to a different bar, where she spent a significant amount of time and which became the context for that part of her life. When I think of someone spending most of their free time in a bar, drinking, I do not picture something jovial and merry, but rather something wallowing in depression and stagnation, regretting misspent years and opportunities… This book tells an absolutely and pleasantly contradictory story!
Rosie’s book and her life may well be packed with bars (bright and dingy alike) and filled with drinking of all shapes and sizes (happy, celebratory drinking, desperate sorrowful drinking, drinking to cement friendships or to give it a buffered farewell), but the feeling of the book surprised me. With that I mean both the feeling she puts into finding ‘her bar’ and maintaining the friendships she found there as well as the overall emotional impression I get of welcome camaraderie and friendly inclusion. There is much more of a warm homecoming feeling of acceptance, of finding a place and people to whom you can belong.
In Raleigh, VA.
Check out the epic road trip on Meerkat Travel Gang
It may be that at the time of reading it I completely understand and have in common that search for the circle of people you enjoy being around without pretense or effort, a place I can cuddle into with people who won’t pry, but will be human when you’re down. After being an obvious expat for a couple of years now (and being very aware of that label), I’ve looked for a place to genuinely laugh and meet new and interesting people who won’t ask me ‘what made you move to—?’ My search may have led me to book clubs, yoga classes or martial arts, but I recognized the same yearning and drive… and now I am not at all opposed to widening my search to finding a place I can call ‘my bar’.
Photo Credit: tricky (rick harrison) via Compfight cc
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